Word on the Streets

"mom, how old do you have to be. . ."

"to go up on stage?"

sunday today. fast sunday at church. this means people in the congregation fast three meals or whatever they choose and donate the money they would have used on those meals to the church's fast offerings. fast offering money goes to a fund from which the bishop can pull to offer aid to members and non-members of the church in his geographical jurisdiction or "ward" boundaries. that being said, on fast sundays our first meeting is where members of the congregation are free to get up and from the pulpit bear a testimony (share what they know to be true.)

today near the last of the meeting, jack asks me the question:

"mom, how old do you have to be to go up on stage?"

at first i could not figure out what he was asking and then i asked him if he wanted to go up to the pulpit. when he said yes i asked him what he would say. he said, "i like the Book of Mormon." and i said that would be good to say. then i asked if there were anything else. he replied, "President Monson is a prophet." i could not believe that he wanted to go up in front of all those people and say something. then secondly, i was surprised that he knew what he wanted to say. then i said he would have to wait until lady speaking was finished. keep in mind the meeting is almost over and the last thing people want is for yet another person to stand up and take more time at the end. everyone's children by that time are squirrley and the adults are ready to stretch their legs. so i let it go and listened to the lady speaking. but jack was persistent. then he talked to morgan about going up. 

it ends up that after the woman left the pulpit jack was up out of his seat ready to go. so how do i say no at this point. jack, morgan and i all shuffle to the front where one of the bishop's counselors pulled out a step for the boys to use to reach over the pulpit to the microphone. jack was first, of course. morgan stood next to him waiting his turn. jack had in his mind what he wanted to say but the sight of 300 people gave him some serious hesitation. so i told him what he told me back in the pews. and he repeated that outloud. he spoke clearly. he did not yell in the mic. he was able to be understood. it was maybe 4 sentences that he said and then finished by saying, "in the name of Jesus Christ, Aamen."

morgan was second. he had the same reaction and so i did the same thing by whispering in his ear what he told me he wanted to tell everyone. morgan was also very clear with his diction. he did not over react with the mic. (usually kids are all over the mic and it just becomes a toy.) i was very impressed. 

i was 9 or 10 before i was able to do that and i did it when my parents happened to be out of town (i went to church with a friend and her family that sunday.) while walking up to the pulpit i really could not believe that it was my children who were leading me up there. i am not afraid to speak in public at all--it is not that. it is just that this time it was not me. it was my son jack who wanted of his own accord to tell people what he is learning. i just can't wait to see what is in the future for these two children of mine. one is bold. the other is meticulous and cautious. both however are getting what i believe to be the most important knowledge one can gain in life. knowledge of how God speaks to us, teaches us and comforts us in this life has immeasurably blessed my life. i am glad to see that it is becoming rooted in them as well.

just a little milestone today. what else will they so that will shock me for good?

 

all or nothing and the nothing is really everything. . .(re: camille)

camille kathleen waite (4.19.2007- 6.15.2008)

this is a follow-up post regarding my niece, camille waite (see previous post.)

today camille's breathing condition changed. she quit breathing on her own. the ventilator then increased to compensate which meant she was totally dependent on it. with this my sister and brother-in-law (steph and jon) decided to having their other three children come up to the hospital room and see her and say goodbye. the girls of course were happy to be there and because they are so young (7,5,2.5) they climbed up on the bed tickled her and gave her kisses. they said they loved her and had a few tender minutes there with their parents.

after the little girls visited the hospital elizabeth and nikki (my sister-in-laws) and i took them up the street to my ward for church. they were able to go to primary with jack and morgan and have something to keep them occupied for two hours. a very special thanks to the teachers who welcomed my sisters children into their classes and provided a nurturing and spiritual environment for them to enjoy today. it was a good place to be for them and for elizabeth, nikki and especially me. i have not really needed much these past 3 days. but i did need those two hours in church. i found that i really wanted to be able to read the scriptures and share with my sunday school class of 10-11 year old girls my testimony--that i know Jesus Christ lives. i was able to and the experience was incredibly helpful to me and i believe for them as well. (the scriptures we were reading this week just happened to be the event in Alma 30 in the Book of Mormon when Korihor, the anti-Christ, asks for a sign to prove there is a Christ. Alma asks him why he needs more signs to believe there is a Christ when the scriptures, the prophets, the earth and all things therein, the planets and their motion are all signs that there is a God.)  that little lesson gave me the opportunity to share with the girls the example of this weekend where because of what happened to camille many people would say, "see there is no God, otherwise how could he let this happen?" and for me this experience is the very time that proves to me there is a God. This is because i am blessed with his grace, peace and understanding of the plan of salvation that tells me Camille and her family will be together as a family forever though right now death will separate them. then i was able to go into Relief Society the 2nd hour. the teacher, a friend of mine, heard about camille and brought my family food. so when she got up to teach--probably because i was there--her emotions were close to the surface and she had difficulty starting her lesson. i just reacted after i could see that she was struggling and i asked her from where i was sitting if she would like some help. she replied yes almost immediately. so i stood and explained in front of the group for those who did not know briefly what had happened to our family. and then i was able to again share my knowledge that Christ lives and supports us with trials such as this and others of a different nature. i mentioned our family's belief that we felt it an all or nothing situation. we were asking for a miracle of a full recovery but if that was not God's will then we desired that she pass quickly. nothing in between those two scenarios was desirable for her or her family. all or nothing. and as i was talking to the group about this i realized that actually the "all" would be great to have come to pass but the "nothing" part of death really is not "nothing"--it is the exact opposite--it is everything! because as a baby she is perfect and will be guaranteed to be with Christ eternally. is that not everything i am striving and working for? sure it is. it is everything Christ promises us if we live our lives as close to His teachings as we possibly can.

having that opportunity to share my thoughts today publicly just really helped me. that might not have been a help for anyone else in my situation but for me it was helpful. i felt peaceful and strong doing it and have felt that same strong, quiet peace all day thereafter. and again, those feelings at this time denote to me that there is a God.

with the change in camille's condition stephanie and jon reset their timeline to what they felt to be more appropriate so as not to drag out camille's suffering--they had all life support removed today at 4 p.m. stephanie and jon, my mother and i were in the room. stephanie and jon both held camille after she was freed from her tubes and machines. she went quickly, very quietly and was gone at 4:15 p.m. they were able to wash her body and remain with her until 6:00 p.m. at which the coroner came.

they went home tonight to their own home with their three others daughters and my parents and siblings, Rod and I and our aunt. the house was full and happy oddly enough. there was a peace there and almost a sense of relief. stephanie had requested someone go to her home before she got there tonight and temporarily remove all of the things associated with a baby (the whole milk in the fridge, the highchair, exersaucer, carseat etc). so my brothers, my husband and two sister-in-laws took care of that this afternoon. some people may not agree with that but for this situation and this mother it was good. someday she will get back to those items. but that will be on her time frame.

lastly, the only thing left to express regarding this weekend is a very sincere "thank you" to those of you who included us and camille and steph and jon in your prayers and thoughts. it helped in ways we have not yet expressed and continues to help us look forward to these next few weeks. again, thank you!

p.s.
there will be a short memorial service on saturday at 9 a.m. at the LDS chapel on tropicana (one block west of eastern). there will be no viewing or open casket. anyone who would like to attend the memorial service is welcome. no obligation necessary.

when the nightmare became reality. . .

this is my sister's daughter, camille kathleen waite. she just turned one and she has all of us in the family, countless friends and perfect strangers joined together in prayers for her right now. yesterday the nightmare of every desert dwelling mother and father became sharp reality for my sister and her family. my sister found her daughter drowned in the backyard spa. camille was unconscious and not breathing. from that moment, my sister and her family's life changed.

camille was taken to the hospital just down the road from my home. at the time my husband and i were sitting in the pool ourselves out at the ritz-carlton lake las vegas for a one night get-away. my parents were watching our boys and dog overnight. my parents waited an hour or so to call us and let us know what happened because they were waiting to find out how serious her condition was going to be. rod and i had just sat down for dinner when he answered the phone and got the news. with the help of excellent staff at the ritz we were assisted in gathering our overnight luggage and car promptly and were able to head directly to the hospital. this was friday night at about 6:00 p.m.

after being resuscitated camille stabilized in a comma with her heart beating and breathing irregularly but severe overall brain damage. there is no good outcome for her with the exception of a God-granted miracle. and after many long hours as a family in discussion and prayer we decided that to ask for that miracle-- a full recovery if it God's will. this is the first moment i have had to sit down in a quiet place and try to put it in writing. yesterday and today have been full of emotion, coordinating, planning, prayer, blessings, communication and tender mercies of peace granted directly from the hand of God.

there are many of our friends who have joined with us in prayer for camille's full recovery. we can't begin to thank you all for your love and prayers offered in her behalf and that of our family. we have all felt an increased amount of peace and clarity today and it is largely due to your faith on her behalf. at this time my sister and her husband are still holding hope and allowing a set time for the manifestation of this miracle. for all of us it is an all or nothing situation. either she recovers fully or she will not be sustained by life support. the pediatric neurologist examined camille today and was able to give enough information to my sister and brother-in-law so that they could pray and fast and make some very difficult decisions. having camille remain one earth with such severe brain damage that she would need almost complete life support is just not a desire of anyone close to her. given the severe trauma she has suffered that is the only possible quality of life if she were to "survive" this, barring of course a miracle.

it is saturday night and as things are right now we have three scenarios to wait for regarding camille.
1) she becomes "brain dead" which means that the brain stem portion of her brain that is functioning to keep her breathing and her heart beating will die. this would mean that the less she breathes on her own the more assistance she will get from the ventilator. if this should happen then she can be pronounced dead but all of her vital organs would be recoverable for other children in need. because the ventilator would eventually take over and breath oxygen into her the organs would be considered healthy, alive and harvest able. this would make my sister and brother-in-law very happy to have a part of camille live on to possibly save a number of other childrens' lives. the horrible loss of camille would provide the life for others.
2) she is the recipient of a miraculous full recovery. my sister and her husband have prayed and fasted that within three days from when she was pulled from the water--thus by this monday at 4 p.m. if there is to be a full recovery that it manifest itself in some unquestionable form.
3) after monday at 4 p.m. camille will be taken off all life support and left for her body to begin the natural process of shutting down with only the relief given for any possible pain that might be incurred. this option is not terribly desirable. no parent wants to have to make this choice. also, because the organs will begin to shut down at different times they will no longer be viable for donation. this means camille's death would not be able to save another child's life.

waiting for any of these is our existence right now.

for me this is my worst nightmare come true. since i have a pool in my backyard i have always lived with this in the back of my mind. i am so sorry that my sister must experience this. to watch her and listen to her and help steel her for the future has made me question so many things. as with any severe tragedy questions of "why" emerge. but almost immediately i have found it so much more beneficial to everyone: my sister, my parents, my siblings and myself to rather ask "what?"

asking "what" breeds doable action for such a non-controllable situation.
for example:
what can i do to help? go get my sister a change of clothing, a toothbrush, a blanket for the icecold room they are in. make phone calls to family with requests or updates. cancel appointments for my sister and make certain her other children are cared for by extended family for the time being. get saline solution for her and make arrangements for her eyeglasses to be dropped off at the hospital. read scriptures to her upon her request to help her occupy her mind. offer prayers. and the list goes on.

the next few days are sure to be trying. and it might not let up for a long time after that even. i am sorry if this post is not written very well or if there are holes in my explanation. i can blame it on lack of sleep and adrenaline shutting down. but i felt compelled to just write it out since i had a window of time available and if i do not take advantage of it now--it will be all that much more overwhelming later.

my sincere thanks for those who are of faith and prayer on our behalf at this time. please please know that i personally feel bolstered and as though there are arms ready stretched and willing to help if there is a need.
may we all be extra mindful this week to care for our little ones a little more tenderly and sweetly. hug your children and breath in deeply as you nestle your nose into their hair. take in every inch of them and remember all it takes is a moment for your life to change course.

if you wish to send my sister and her family any words of support and love you can do so by going to their family blog here and leaving a comment. they are accessing this blog from the hospital and i know it would be appreciated.

a sunday to remember. . .

Gordon B. Hinckley.
If I know anything, I know this man was a prophet of the Lord Jesus Christ. He passed away today at age 97.

All my life I have believed in the concept of having a prophet of God on the Earth. It just makes sense to me that since God spoke to men in ancient times as in the Bible like Moses, Abraham, Isaac etc. to lead His people, then surely God would call a prophet in my own day too. I need just as much direction in following God's plan as people in ancient times did if not more!

I believe that Jesus Christ speaks directly to His prophet and instructs Him how to lead His church and lead His followers. The prophet teaches me what Christ wants me to do in this life to qualify for life with Him in the eternities.

I know this man was a prophet of God. Gordon B. Hinckley was the president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and a prophet of the Lord Jesus Christ. There have been prophets before him and there will be prophets after him. However, since he became the prophet in March of 1995, I feel like he has been a great source of strength for me somewhat more than other prophets before him. From 1995-2008 I have experienced big changes in my life and had to adapt to new career paths, married life and then life with children (2 at once). Many times when I heard President Hinckley speak I could feel encouragement and motivation to just keep trying the best I could to be more prayerful, more humble, more grateful as well as cleaner, smarter and more true to the faith.

For more information about him or about Christ's prophets and apostles today visit The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints here for a more comprehensive explanation.

*of note: yesterday and today our congregation along with others in our area were scheduled to have a conference together at which President Hinckley's son was coming to visit us. he flew in and then a few hours before the meeting he was called to return to salt lake immediately. he did so and another guest speaker was assigned to fill his place at our church meetings yesterday and today. now it makes sense and i am glad he was able to get the word in time that he needed to return home. how fortunate that he was able to be with his father for his passing. 

the end of african connections

this is the last day my dad could call me from africa. my parents have been serving as humanitarian missionaries in kenya for almost two years. today was their last day there and my dad called for some technical computer question for rod. but then i realized this would be the last call we get from them there. it was sort of odd and sad.
i have loved having my parents there. for some reason it has been a really wonderful thing. most people would say they could never have their parents go that far away for that long. i subscribe to a different mindset i guess. for me it was like they were on a big adventure and doing super meaningful things. i knew they were busy and happy. i knew they were getting such a great perspective on the world at large and i relished the fact that them being there made us a global family.
it is just odd to think that we might never have those same kinds of ties to africa as we did with my parents there--on the ground--in the bush--in the thick of life as it is there.
they have a long couple of flights in front of them to get home. it will be nice to have them around i think. they have not really been here much since we moved here from vancouver, b.c. to be closer to family. but i have really rather-ed them there. that may seem odd but with them there they seemed to be more present in my daily thoughts than with them home doing the normal busy run-a-round town and daily duties here.

here is to parents who venture to great limits! here is to parents who are willing to step out of their comfort zone and really experience life to the fullest.

hooo-rah.

yeah team harris!

m & j clark with my parents a & m harris in nairobi, kenya 2007

what a wonder!

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is everywhere in the world. I love the fact that I can go to any part of the world and find a congregation of this church. I love the fact that people in those varied parts of the world greet foreigners with a welcome smile and in the case of Hawaii--a handmade crocheted lei. I love the fact that every congregation teaches the same lessons worldwide on the same Sunday. I love the fact that we all have fast and testimony meeting on the first Sunday of every month. I love the fact that every congregation has a primary program for the little kids and they all teach the same songs and lessons. There are some little cultural takes on things like the welcome song in the primary sharing time in Hawaii was a song saying "A-L-O-H-A, we're glad you came to be our friend here in Hawaii". Then the children all made handmade leis with & for the visitors out of straw segments and die cut paper flowers and string. (an easy group activity for a congregation that has less regulars than visitors sometimes.)
one year ago we were in kenya, africa and went to church there too.
Rod & Lesli Streets, Ann & Morgan Harris (Lesli's parents) and Darren Harris (Lesli's brother) infront of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Nairobi, Kenya.
After going to church on Sunday in Nairobi we were able to travel out to the more remote village churches. These buildings were prefabricated and brought in from South Africa. They look like temples in the middle of the bush! (photo below)

When we travel I think one of the most interesting things to do is to go to church where ever we are just to rub shoulders with members of the same mindset and beliefs as us. There is an instant bond there and it connects me more to the pulse of life in that area. I have been to LDS churches in so many places: Canada, Mexico, England, Scotland, Russia, Japan, Africa and all over the U.S.  What a great wonder it is that The Church of Jesus Christ is dotting the world map in rapidly growing numbers.

i remember where I was this day 6 years ago. Do you?
This was such a horrific day. I am not sure any September 11th will come without me remembering where I was and what I was feeling or thinking. When I stop to remember the events of this day in '01 I find myself even more grateful for my knowledge of the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ. It helps with that pit in my stomach that aches for the pain caused that day.

for more info about our beliefs or answers to life's important questions go to  www.mormon.org 
Enjoy.